Zen and the Art of Transhumanism

Zen and the Art of Transhumanism

Hello everybody, my name is Markiplier Welcome to Zen and the Art of Transhumanism Now that’s a big title but I don’t exactly know what this game is about Except for… pottery Oddly enough, that’s the only description I have seen about the game and I don’t know how that plays.. into the actual– Hello Hi Who are you? oh.. “Hello World” OH are you a robot!? Oh you’re a cool robot “Greetings, Akara-184, welcome to the job” “H+CORPS expects you to be an excellent human upgrade crafter” “Feel free to inspect your work zone until you’re comfortable” “Let me know when you are ready to accept requests” “Yes, Master. Thank you.” Well that’s a little bizarre I don’t have a gamepad, am I supposed to be playing with a game pad? I could do that, I’m gonna do that just in case since it seems to be the A button is important here Hello, ah “You can check your finished pieces here” “This is the operating theater” “Here you’ll receive our clients and install the necessary upgrades” “Are you ready to get started on clients?” No I wanna, I wanna study a little longer No I want to study a little longer Gimmie a few more seconds on this one “This is the potter disk.” “With it you will shape handcrafted limbs and organs for the clients” OH! “This is the official H+CORP transhumanist wiki” “You should check it to memorize some useful designs and know more about their effects” Okay “This interface holds data on this months client list” “With it, you can keep track of client’s progress and satisfaction” Okay Sounds bizarre and interesting, I’m totally into it Yes, I am ready Why can’t, why is this no, eh gamepad no work on there! Alright whatever “Perfect, first one coming” Oh Hi! Woah! Hello! Hi! Human! You’re naked! Why are you naked? Why are you naked here?? I once again ask, why are you naked?? Hello Check clients file, I guess Caroline Kramer, 19 Clickbait writer “No matter what I do, I can’t get my follower count over 1000” “Please help me!” Okay, Alrighty then So “The Enchantress Increase your online social network charisma” Well that sounds important I think that’s what we need Okay, wait– oh! Ah, so I need to make that pattern in the pottery Oooh That’s what it meant, OH! Oh my goodness gracious!! Wow that is cool What? What? What? Oh man Oh that’s cool! So I can’t remember what I’m– designs, I need to actually look at the designs Can I get a design? Oh I push it! Oh I boosh it! Oh that’s so cool! *Yes It Is Mark! ^_^* That’s a buttplug That’s a dildo That’s ANOTHER dildo There we go, that’s what I want Okay, and I gotta get– Shit! No! God Damn It! That’s not what I wanted! I didn’t mean to push that, sorry! I don’t think this is the right– GOD FUCKING DAMN IT that’s not what I’m trying to do! Okay, whew I feel like this would be easier with a mouse, than it would be with– Hang on let me try it with a mouse Maybe I never should have done it with– Oh geez, yeah, okay A little more precision ha ho ho ha ho ho ha hu hu huu Oh no, OH NO, OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH I fucked it up I fucked it up, I fucked it up, reset, there we go Good thing that’s possible And I don’t understand where she’s gonna shove this To make it all acceptable It’s like momentum based, it’s super weird eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh little more, little more woah woah woah there we go there we go Nailing it, yeah! Nailed it, Nailed it! Nailed it! End that, Bam Bitch! Okay! Got it, production complete The Enchantress! I got it! Okay, let’s do that Increase your social network online It looks beautiful! (singing) IT LOOKS BEAUTIFUL Let’s give that to you, Install modules With That Bam, A bloomsky! Woah, ew ew ew Huh? How?! How will that work? Nice dick! What is going on? You seem pissed! That will make – But will that make her happier? Probably, considering it’s what she wanted Okay Majima Shun, 40 There’s a new gang in town that’s been causing problems And they’re strong I need to get rid of them at any cost Okay! I got, I got the right thing to shove up your butt for something like that! It looks a lot like This The Knight, Okay The Knight, you say Well, we’ll try it, I dunno if it will be good Designs– nope– aaahh fucking cock! What what why the double press? why wut why OH COME ON! Why the double press? There we go, god damn it ok Okay, here we go, here we go Alright here we go here we go here we go eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh hye hye Oh it’s so hard, oh god It’s so hard to do oooooooooh! OH IT HURTS MY BRAIN IT HURTS MY BRAIN FUCK! Oh god you don’t understand Oh it really hurts my brain, oh I can’t do that with the game pad, I just can’t Holy shit I can’t Oh my god I’ve never seen like, more difficult controls. Okay here we go euh uh uh Oh it’s so frustrating, oh the controls they hurt my braaaain Oh, the controls hurt my brain HOO HOO heh heh, there we go I got this The night incoming, III’M A ROBO! I’m good at my jooob and there we go Okay Holy shit Oh my god that’s so difficult to do Got it – NOOOO! STOP THAT Alright here we go Doesn’t look very useful Shut up! I didn’t even try to do that I’m gonna do this, Install modules, I got The Knight Go for it Shooove it right up in his gullet Whabam Okay It’s gonna cause some serious damage Hello! Nice beard, and dick! How ya doin? I wonder if that was sensible on our side. Probably. Okay Jordi de Paco, 28 Game Designer “No matter what I do, I can’t make a good game” “I want to make a game that is critically acclaimed by press and public” Well I don’t know how my… thing’s gonna be doing that And I don’t know why you guys keep showing up naked to my office Not that I mind very much, but it’s just a little distracting Okay, The Bishop: Genuinely enlightens your mind Maybe I should just, make, some of all of these That would make sense, right? Oh, I’m getting it now, so like If I use the right tool in the right spot I won’t need to worry about doing it around because it’ll just flow it all around aaaaaaaaaah ah, it cool! It cool! It work, it work, ok That’s really cool I didn’t know I would be playing a game entirely based around sculpting Even though that’s what I said at the beginning of this, I didn’t know the ENTIRE game was sculpting Oh that’s my best one yet Oh that’s a beaut! Ah, Mwah! Mwah! That’s a beaut! Ok, I’m just going to keep making them all I’m gonna do all the making of them Right here So the– the answer is fairly obvious for these things TADAAAAAH NAH NAH NAH NAAH Bam! Done The Prince! Okay that’s good Okay, so I’m gonna keep making them Ah, I get music while I work! I don’t typically listen to music on my own anyways so this is bizarre Ok, so I believe this goes on the *in British accent* bottom boootom That’ll just, hollow all that out there we go and done and done! and I need… Not this one Eventually I’ll need this one but come back to that one This one, which is going to do this whole son of a bitch section right Just like – OH THAT’S FUN! ART IS FUN! I LIKE ART! NYAH NYAH NYAH Yeah, Yeah YEAH that’s more like it *in some kind of English accent* That’s more like it! The Empress, ok got it, ok this one Alrighty then, I think I know how to do this Oh that’s SO COOL Oh man, I’m easily excitable but this actually is legitimately interesting to me Like a lot of parts of games is like A lot of people forget, there’s story and then there’s gameplay And For some reason this gameplay is like really appealing to me, like I have never really played anything like it So, it’s bizarre and odd but it’s just an interesting experience And that’s like fascinating, because that’s not often something that people get There we go, ok Ah that almost perfect That almost perfect! The Temple! Oh! I’ll be right with you game designer, you just stand there naked for a few more hours I’ll be done. Oh yeah cause now I’m gonna be working on the butt plug I kinda forgot that was gonna be a prettymuch Thing I’mmuna do Alright, there we go. Buttplug Complete! Perfectly ready for insertion! “The Pond”, Suuuure it is More like The Pound, because it’s gonna… poun- Nevermind Shoebadubipiadoo boink and a-boink ok there we go and yeee-boink ok Ah! Oh No! Oh Nooo! Noooo! No I messed up! Oh! I had it perfect! Ah! God Damn It! I’m a fucking failure I’m a failure at everything, I tried to be too perfect And I just cocked it alllll up I Cacked it allll up Ah, yup ah, eh ahhyup ahhyup eh eh oohyup ahhyup ooohyup Production complete, the snowflake Oh yes, oh yes indeed, the beautiful Snowflake Done. Ok. Produc – The Cloud, oh ok. I dunno if there’s anymore Buttplug That one That one This one, Oh I think this one is the last one, or I am pretty sure anyway heh Heh Heeeh HEEEH Ok I think that was the very last one The Void Ok, so you’re gonna need Uh, Prooooobably this one, the Bishop Have fun with that up in your gut by everything you eat I’m sure this developer will come up with some cool games now But does this kind of success benefit him? Yeah, probably Let’s see, what do you need Pitor Garfield, 52 Doctor Chemist “I spent my whole life in research and I never had a girlfriend” “Please. I want to have sex, I want to fuck a lot of people” Well I’ve got just the thing probably! “Empowers your overall sex appeal” Okay, just have that in there Whip that out when you’re ready and you’ll be great to go “I’m sure that guys sexual life is about to bloom” “I just hope that’ll be enough for him” Well Maybe, Maybe not, but who am I to judge Patricia Lafayette, 97 Singer “I’ve enjoyed a fancyful life, now I can’t help but feeling my end is near” “I don’t want to abandon the stardom and my fans, please, do something” Y’know, Lady You may just be a pile of pixels but for 97 years old Hot Damn! You’re looking pretty good! I mean uh I just want to calls em like I sees em *For God’s Sake* Okay Lifespan? You got it Shove that right up on in there, you’re fragile enough that you can take it. “Patricia just bought herself some extra time.” “Did you know that immortality was considered a curse by some ancient cultures?” I think I consider it a curse too Let’s see Check clients file, Carolina Kramer, Clickbait Writer “No matter what I–” Oh! “Wow, my follower count went wild thanks to you” “But now there are a lot of assholes harassing me” That’s no good I suppose I forgot that there’s something over here that I can use to check up on “Which folder do you wanna access?” Ok, completed jobs No completed jobs? Well there might be some completed jobs, what’re you talking about? Caronlina Kramer Okay, anyway So yeah, that’s fine So I’m just doing follow-ups now so Now what do you want? I’m not sure Eliminates the need for social acceptance Maybe I should have installed that first That would have been good “You freed her from her dull craving, well done” Hello! What is wrong with you? You decided to put on some clothes “Brutal, I’ve never had so many good ideas” “I even won a Ludum Dare!” “Still, I feel like I won’t ever surpass Hideo Kojima” Okay Surpresses any violent impulses I don’t think that’s the right one Removes EVERY type of ambition AH GREAT That’s good for the human spirit, I’m sure “His ego won’t do him any good, you’ve just saved him” Oh yea It feels like it Let’s see what about you “I feel so full of life, thank you, my fans already noticed it” “Never the less, how long will this last, could I get some more?” uhm Maybe, maybe not Let’s see, cancels any carnal impulses Concedes Un.. Uhn… unconc… Undoncitonal acceptance towards death Okay, have some of that lady I bet that feels good *Mark… WHYYY?!!!!!!* “To be free from oneself, that’s the summit of any existence” Nice dick! alright “Amazing, I could feel their bones breaking under my knuckles” “However they brought even stronger fighters now” “Make me stronger” oh kaay How bout How bout a nice buttplug for ya Lets see, cancels any carnal impulses, supresses any violent impulses There we go, shove that up your butt and show em what for “You just made the world a lot more peaceful, you did well” Let’s see what about you “I’m exhausted, I’m so happy, thank you so much” “Sadly, there are still some beauties who resist my charms” Okay, what if I double up I kinda wanna double up on this guy I wonder what would happen if I did I really wonder what would happen Hang on One second I’m gonna make him up another prince Because I think it’d be funny to see what happens So this is probably not going to do him a whole lot of good buuuuut I wanna see I’m just a little curious I’m going to make you even more irresistible Have some of that gooo goood “I’m sure this guys sexual life is about to bloom!” oh.. hi “I just hope that’ll be enough for him” Alright welcome back exhausted ah god damn it So what happens if I completely dominate this guy with only princes I mean there’s every possibility that I could do that and I think in the eventuality what it’s trying to say is that he would be completely replaced by robotic parts, at that point and then he would no longer be Human But at the same time, removing all of these base impulses is also taking away their humanity, so what in reality is better I can’t just remove all of his sexual desires, would that be good? I dunno, who am I to say maybe in this one person maybe he really should have non stop sexual bliss, for as long as he may live Ok so I made three more of these things NOOPE Nope no no Get outta there, end end end end end that’s not what I meant to do I know it’s not very useful I know, I know, I know I made three more of these things because That might be just enough to completely transform this person Into a robot, HAVE SOME OF THAT I’ll see you around the bend okay, sexual life about to bloom huh alright Let’s give you another one another one, why don’t cha Have fun with that aah Hello, welcome back You want one more? I’ve got one more for you You’re gonna be a sexual dynamo, let me just make sure like What is he actually saying? Exhausted I wonder if anyones actually be able to have sex with you once you’re completely robo Welcome to the club Oh I need to make one more than, I need to make Just One More Okay buddy, here ya go Last one you’ll ever need hoba da boo boop Have fun WAIT WHAT Hello?! What!? Who are you? Who the hell are you? Well this game’s broken! FINE! BE NEUTERED! There have that! Go on Get outta here Woah “Well done Akara-184, you’ve mastered the art of Transhumanism” “Now you’re ready to help us shape the new world” “See you at the other side” “Understood master, thank you” Okay But that poor guy Man, he fucked himself to death and then right back around the loop of life back into normal humanism Well there ya go That is Zen and the Art of Transhumanism Hope you enjoyed it! Something to think about, and then something not to think about later on, but either way, a fun game, and an oddly enough fun to do some sculpture Thank you again! And as always I will see you In the next video! Buh Bye! *outro music*

100 thoughts on “Zen and the Art of Transhumanism”

  1. i kind of feel like Akara is the bad guy. People want his help,and when they need more,he removes that part of them entierly

  2. This is a world where they're essentially removing the humanity that makes us have emotions… Causing all humans to no longer need sex, egos…

  3. Behold… Zen and the Art of MEAT! [Free E-Cookies to anyone who gets the reference… and no it is not to this game. Think "2K Games".]

  4. Cherryblossom ink

    that's how real pottery works in real life with lots of practice u should try it and do a video on your first pottery work I do it its awsome

  5. You don't improve upon 'humanity'. You find better ways to let humanity do things, that humanity already wanted to do.

    There's no great arcane mystery here. If given the choice between your fingers and a shovel, to do the same kind of work, you use a fucking shovel. If the shovel happens to be a part of your hand, then you use your fingers, rather than running to the tool shed to carry around a heavy piece of wood and metal.

    Making humans better is not something 'new', just because it suddenly involves the meat attached to our bones. Were that the case, we'd not have modern medicine, surgery, or any manner of technology. At which point, death would be determining our technology for us, by killing off the lot of us that don't make the cut.

    Survival is the rawest, most indirect form of transhumanism, and there is no stopping it. Don't like it? Suicide.

  6. Mark this is very important but this game has been sort of full released on steam and has more story! It's called Buy The Red Strings Club! I saw it on steam and was sure that I saw you play it I knew you did.

  7. Did anyone else get really frustrated when Mark would read the incredibly heavy-handed hints that he shouldn't go to the first, most obvious mod, then install the first, most obvious mod without a second thought (and without even READING THE OTHER OPTIONS).

    I love you Mark but I literally threw my phone watching this one.

  8. MARK!! This was actually a demo and the full game is out now it’s called THE RED STRINGS CLUB!! It’s really good with a cool story you should check it out please

  9. this reminds me of some of the beliefs of Buddhism. basically you push away your desires in order to end your suffering. you'll never be hungry if you don't desire food, basically.

  10. Hey Mark! You should play the whole game its called "The red strings club" on steam. I became attached to the characters in the game its pretty good!

  11. How do you sculpt AND talk?! I concentrated the HECK out of my brain and my shit looks like shit. "You have mastered the art of transhumanism," Master said. At least I got one of us fooled. A super-interesting game, though short. It ended just when I got a handle on it. I keep thinking it would've been cool if there had been an option to mix and match, or consequences instead of "Client pissed, fix it." Oh shucks, can't have everything.

    Thanks a bunch for finding all of these unseen marbles, Markiplier.

  12. LOL Maybe that's precisely the point the developer was trying to make with the last guy: that you keep greedy, and you lose everything.

  13. Russell From UP's Official Youtube Channel

    Transhumanism is this thing were people hate flesh and want to replace there body parts with machinery so there body works better sorta

  14. Mr Doctor Professor Patrick

    I just played the red strings club, but there you could do some fun things besides just giving into what the client asked and what would make him stop coming back. Like instead of giving the last guy the prince, make him charismatic online and he'd come back talking about how he got tons of girls online but he also wants more money now to get girls.

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